C’mon, Already! FORGET 9/11. And Christmas.

I heard somebody say they were making sure to remember 9/11. Because you know how easy it would be to forget that!

Actually, let’s do it. Forget 9/11!
Now that you can’t remember it, doesn’t it seem kind of silly you just killed 60,000 Arabs? DID WHUT!? Oh, don’t act stupid. You can’t remember the provocation for such a brutal, barbarian, heinous, cataclysmic attack you just committed? Well, you just did it. What would possess you to go and murder 60,000 innocent people? You are nice people. You watch football, drink Dr Pepper, have sex in parks. You don’t just go killing 60,000 of anybody whenever you feel like it. In fact, that’s got to be just some left-wing lie. 60,000 Arabs? “No way! Like, whoa, dude! Why would I do that?” And, you just did! Just casually watched it happen on the news, with embedded reporters no less!

Now Forget Christmas!
All forgotten? Good. Now, why are we killing baby pine trees? Wouldn’t they be more at home growing in the yard or in the forest? This is really bizarre, because out of impulse we are chopping down trees, causing global warming, when we should be planting them. Now we are at Wal-Mart buying junk from China. You, me. American neighbors! Progressive, conservative, black, white, Jewish, Arab, Armenian, South East Asian… Why would we be doing that all at the same time? Won’t this be a problem for our landfills? Well, kind of silly. It’s breaking the bank too. Why not just give it to the poor? NOT for the poor. Silly me, I thought this was some charity potlatch. Better get it gift-wrapped, then.

Now remember everything again.
Ahhh, everything makes perfect sense now!

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